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The Gross Movie Pool: 2015

Mini Minions Make Many Moolah - Week 11

If you can make a mountain out of a molehill, it only makes sense that you can make a blockbuster with sidekicks.

Inside Out's In; Ted Drops Dead; Terminator Exodus; Nothing Up Magic Mike's Sleeve - Weeks 8, 9, 10

Sorry for the multi-week absence, but given what's been happening at the box-office, there's only two films that are creating yellow joy core memories. The others are causing blue sadness core memories of lost investments, the death of franchises, and diminished salary demands for next pictures. What's a Hollywood to do when America doesn't care about foul-mouthed teddy bears, futuristic cyborgs, and male strippers anymore?

'Jurassic World' Stomps Over The Planet - Week 7

Sometimes surprises catch you off-guard. Like you knew U2 stopped making memorable music a few albums ago, and yet you were still like, "Seriously, guys, you thought this was good?" when their latest effort was dumped onto everyone's iPhones. Other times, you're completely blown away, like that time Julia Roberts married Lyle Lovett. Look, I understand people making youthful mistakes when you're young, but no one makes youthful mistakes with Lyle Lovett. The point is let's just chalk Week Seven in the 2015 Summer Movie Pool as the time we were all completely blown away.

No Fault With San Andreas; Spy is Left a Little in the Cold - Weeks 5 & 6

Finally... The Rock... has come back to the Summer Movie Pool. Ok, ok, he was just here in 2014 with Hercules, but those were no Legendary Journeys. And, of course, he was there in Fast & Furious 6 in 2013, but he was like cotton candy at the circus. You know you're going to get it when you go there, but it's not the main reason you went in the first place. But this... This!... This is a film people are seeing and it all has to do with the most electrifying man in sports entertainment... Well, that and about $130 million in special effects.

The Sun Didn't Really Come Out For 'Tomorrowland' - Week 4

Memorial Day Weekend is often the super weekend of the whole box-office season. Three whole days of making money hand-over-CGI fist. The box-office hits of Memorial Day Weekend become a thing of legend. People remember where they were and who they were with when they saw Return of the Jedi, Jurassic Park 2, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (the all-time Memorial Day Weekend champ with $139.8 million), and, of course, Earnest Goes To Camp. However, when it all goes wrong, as it did five years ago with the double dud of Prince of Persia and Sex in the City 2, it turns this hallowed holiday into Flag Day... as in Wave the White Flag Day.

'Pitch' Perfectly Tunes Out 'Mad Max' - Week 3

When people think of summer movies, they usually think of action films, special effects, stunts, car chases, grip strength, and the sweaty men who fill them. I guess now we can add pitch pipes, harmonizing, a cappella, and the only thing guys are carrying is a tune.

'Hot Pursuit' is Only Mildly Pursued - Week 2

Two years ago a celebrated TV actress and a bonafide box-office queen lit-up the summer season in as a pair of mismatched crime-fighting misfits. The former hallowed ground of testosterone and CGI gave way to the feminine wiles of its leads as they winked, sashayed, and swore like sailors without a thesaurus. While the real world knows lightning never strikes twice, that's never stopped Hollywood before, so it was clear to repeat the success of Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock in The Heat, all they needed was another TV star and a recognizable theatrical name. It's like trying to remake Lethal Weapon with the Twinkie cop from Die Hard and Charlie Sheen... Or maybe that's who they should've cast in Loaded Weapon 1.
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